the abyss means...

I don't know whether it was the fear that the school-child behind me on the bus would get gum on me, or the memory of early morning rides up to the hospital with my mother loudly chewing her gum, slurp, slurp, smack, or even just the smell of the bus I take to work every morning, but, whatever it was I now know why I can't stand chewing gum.

Chewing.

Slurping.

Stinky.

Sticky.

Gum.

Ugh.

It isn't why I thought.

I thought I had disliked gum from a childish fear that the gum would stick to my tongue piercing and then I'd be stuck with gum in my mouth.

That was never really sensible and I never really believed it...

But the bus reminded me of the smell.

I had forgotten the smell.

When I was working as a cleaner I was given a job. It was the school holidays, and the floors needed cleaning, polishing, buffing.

None of this could be done unless the chewing gum was removed.

By hand.*

(It was actually one of the more sensible jobs to give me, as it couldn't result in me scarring myself, blinding myself or developing phobias...)

There would be black raised bumps on the floor. Solid, dark, non-sticky matter.

I would score round the edges, and the lump would suck away from the floor.

Up it would come.

Strangely easily.

Underneath the solid black would be the moist chewing gum which had vacuumed onto the floor. It would be happy to come away from the floor. As it jumped up from the floor, each one would release its air-bubble of stale minty-spittleness.

That smell was strong.

The air had been waiting to be released for a long time.

I really don't like chewing gum.
_______________

* Well, not actually by hand.

I used a palate knife.

But I did have to crawl around on the floor to do it.

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People chewing gum reminds me of cows chewing the cud. Probably why i don't like the stuff...

emma on May 14, 2003 04:47 PM

You've eloquently shown here all that is evil and despicable about chewing gum. I never could stand the stuff myself.

Bill on May 14, 2003 09:54 PM

You've eloquently shown here all that is evil and despicable about chewing gum. I never could stand the stuff myself.

Bill on May 14, 2003 09:54 PM

Chewing gum is evil.

joh on May 18, 2003 12:51 PM

I have a major Phobia of gum... I HATE it. The smell, taste, texture... I have even been brought to tears from people pulling it out of their mouth in my presence.

Kelly on October 1, 2003 09:15 PM

Oh my gosh, I HATE GUM. I am so afraid of gum I can't even stand it. I wish it didn't even exist. I hate everything about it. Oh and what really gets to me is when people stick it on things, like chairs and tables. Man, just thinking about it makes me have panic attacks.

Shannon on January 20, 2004 05:06 AM

I agree, argh, disgusting stuff!

Matt on June 2, 2004 04:25 PM